**This blog was written by a man and from a males point of view**
For about as long as I’ve been sexually aware, which has been around 20 years now, I’ve always noticed the norms of sex. Men with women is the vast composition of how it all works, it’s the norm. Also, my entire life, I’ve been in line with that. I’ve never had any emotion towards men, and I’m 100% for women. That’s how it is, and that’s how it will always be.
However, at the same time there’s a whole different side of what’s going on around than what I’m into as well. Homosexuality isn’t new; it’s been around for as long as humans have. However, in the revolution of recent times and social norms being more lenient than at any time before, it has come into the forefront more than ever during my time on Earth. And you know what? It doesn’t bother me in the slightest. But you know what else? I’m waaaaay far in the male minority, admittedly or not. I’ve never understood this. My take on life in general is that if it isn’t affecting me, either negatively or positively, it doesn’t bother me. But for so many men, there’s an automatic deflection against anything homosexual at all, whether it’s a person, a supposed color alignment and definitely the connotation that association can personally bring. It’s treated like a plague or something that should be avoided because it can rub off somehow. What it’s become is like the adult version of coodies, which is a theory we long should have grown away from (unless you’re still as smart as you were when you were six, which may be a bit of a mature estimate for a lot of folks when it comes to the subject).Yet at the same time, we so freely associate with so many more outwardly harmful things with complete acceptance. Domestic abuse, drug users/abusers and even straight out killers. All are given much more acceptance than a person who simply doesn’t have the same desires as you may have in a mate. There are a lot of things I don’t understand, but this is right up towards the top of the list (along with why Chipotle is so good and why people drink rail liquor after the age of 21).
A lot of the time, this gets labeled as homophobic, which isn’t exactly right. While there are clear purely homophobic people, there are plenty of people that aren’t homophobes in any way, shape or form. A phobia implies a fear, and I know of plenty of people who have no fear of gays, but still condemn them for how they choose to live their lives. It’s a default dislike, that while they wouldn’t be violent against one, it still changes the entire way they view a person based on what they sexually associate with. I’ve seen this happen personally in my life, with me in the middle. About three years ago, a friend and mentor of mine came out. Now this is a person that is well known in several circles of my college community, and well liked as well. When he made his decision to share that with the world at large, the reactions were many and varied. Some people were shocked, some people found it funny, others seemed just generally curious.
However, the most interesting reactions were the people that seemed put off or just plain angry. This is a person that you have formed a bond with, and is still that exact same person. A person that if you’d asked about just 10 minutes earlier, you’d have nothing but praise for, now you are uncomfortable around them for something that they’ve never projected on you at any point, but is now an “invisible threat” of some sort. That’s a mentality I will never understand. It changed nothing for me with him. I shared the same jokes, conversations and debates we always had. It just so happened he had a boyfriend now too, who was another really cool dude as well. I sensed no difference in him, and me? I’m unaffected. There are far worse things that a person can be than gay. It’s not a bad thing to be gay. It’s different than me, sure, but is it something that completely defines who a person is, absolutely not. No more than my heterosexuality defines who I am. Sure, it’s a major element of a major part of my life, but does it change anything about my philosophies on life, what I enjoy and what my conversation and outlook on essential things like spirituality, politics and even food is? No, and it doesn’t for them either.
Think about how little the choice of mate really makes in your relationship with both your established friends and people you meet in random occurrences in life. Differences do separate us, but at the same time, they don’t have to divide us.
– @CheapSeatFan
The Erotic Nerd 